In the previous entry I discussed my girth/length test. It’s not meant to prevent orgasms, just to allow women the opportunity to reflect on their options.
But trust me, men are just as bad if not even worse.
They think they’re slick by starting foreplay off with a little index and middle finger action on your clit. Then they skip down a few inches and insert the two fingers into your pussy (those who are aggressive have been known to use three or more).
Next they probe you with the mind boggling, hopefully rhetorical question of, “Damn baby, what does your shit taste like?”
Um negro, how the fuck should I know?
And ladies if you do know, please don’t answer when a dude asks.
So, he proceeds to pull out his fingers (or entire hand) and begins to suck on them in order to prove that he is a pussy juices connoisseur.
Do not let this shit fool you. Dude is just applying the age-old “does her pussy have a tangy smell” test.
He is determining whether you are eatable.
Whether you are clean enough for him to risk suffocation.
Whether your shit is funky and reminds him of the smell of chitterlings or raw, spoiled seafood.
Or worse, the smell of BUDUSSY.
And then there’s the other method of testing. This is when a dude may be too shy to ask how you taste, so instead he pulls his fingers out and distracts you for a few seconds by asking a random question and when the opportunity presents itself, he sniffs.
He may even pull the fake cough trick, cover his mouth, and take a quick whiff.
All in all, you better past the old sniff-a-roo test or no cunnilingus for you.
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