Boys Will Be Boys

Faye says I make too many excuses for Deondre.  She hates when women make excuses for men.  I agree, but the reality is we all make excuses for men.  Whether we are fucking them, trying to fuck them, or have been fucked over by them, women naturally curve the amount of bullshit flung there way by lightening the blow with a simple excuse.

She claims she won’t be like most mothers and make excuses for her sons.  I told her she’s full of it and will continue to perpetuate the same cycle our grandmothers did.  She believes the problem begins during childhood.  Mothers make excuses for their sons, and as they develop into men the women in there lives are forced to continue the cycle.

When my little brother was caught kissing a girl in the coatroom, my stepmother exclaimed, “He’s just being a boy.”

When my cousin punched the neighborhood kid in his face and broke his nose, my aunt was proud and exclaimed, “At least my boy ain’t no punk.”

When my father missed my college graduation my mother said, “Don’t get upset, sometimes men forget the simplest things.”

When Deondre played me last week, Faye stated, “He’s a nigga, but I’m sure he’ll call tomorrow.”

No matter how much we try, no matter how the statement is re-worded, women are always liable for excusing the behavior of men.

My homegirl Lisa commented that she’s tired of making excuses for men and wants to date men who are excusable.  Men who know no better than to disrespect a woman, not to call when promised, cancel fuck appointments and reappear weeks later as though nothing happened.  She believes the only excusable men are goons. 

But this only creates the mindset that higher education denotes respect and just plain ole human decency.  But it doesn’t.  A man with a Ph.D. is not going to respect you because he wrote a 100-page dissertation.  He will only respect you if his momma taught him that kissing the little girl in the coatroom was wrong and not something acceptable just because he was a boy.

It’s a vicious cycle and I have no solution, but if an excuse can lighten the harsh reality that most men aren’t shit, that most of them are fuck ass pussy ass niggas, that there is no hope they’ll ever evolve and even when they are 31 they will always be boys waiting for a female to pacify their behavior, then excuses it shall be.