Friday, October 10, 2008

We Want More but Accept Less

My friend presented me with the perfect analogy forcing me to deal with my denied feelings for Deondre.

It went a little something like this:

When you want $100 from someone, do you settle for $20 and hope over time they give you the remaining $80? Or do you demand the full $100 and settle for nothing less?

He was right on point with his comment,and it made me realize that by settling for 20 you need to realize the person will never give you more because they realize from your actions you are open and willing to settle for less and less will suffice.

They will never respect your negotiation skills. They will never believe in your ability to be and remain patient. They will always see you as being worth less than what you are.

When you accept the 20, how after a few months can you reasonably expect the remainder?

So ladies, ask yourself: do you want the whole sha-bang, the full course meal? Do you want the man?

Or can you only handle the appetizer? Do you only want his dick, do you only want a fuck friend?

By accepting just dick you will limp away bowlegged with a throbbing clit, but don't think the arrangement will lead from appetizers to an entree to dessert to drinks to breakfast to a ring asking for your pussy in marriage.

If you ask for sex, accept just sex, and leave with sex. Do not present unattached pussy only to attach your heart to your clit and eventually become attached to him because it won't work.

But if you want more than sex admit this. Stop denying your hunger and tell him you want more than an appetizer and warn him you might order dessert afterwards. Let him know that you want a relationship. Let him know that you care. Let him know you are willing to be patient if patience means you get it all- that you get him!

But if you choose to be shy, to be too afraid to order more while sitting their with your stomach grumbling, then realize his 20 is just that. It ain't a raincheck for 80, it ain't an IOU, its unattached sex.

When you settle for less but desire more you only end up hurt and wanting more. If you allow 20, if you fuck him suck him and try to love him, he will opt for the first two and remind you that, "This ain't no love thang, we just kickin' it."

The way a relationship begins will determine the dynamic between the two individuals. If it's just sex, it will always be sex. Your ability to suck his balls while stroking his dick making him cum will never be enough for him to make you wifey.

So know what you want and accept only that. In the process of wanting more you may get rejected, but at least you avoided a potential breakdown of sitting outside his house at night with binoculars calling 30 times a day. This will only end in a restraining order and the label of "that crazy bitch I used to fuck back in the day".

You will only get hurt when he opens his wallet and tells you that he ain't got $100 to give. That he can only spot you $20.

But you will be devastated if he spots you a $20 and tells you to stick around for the rest, only for him to never pay up. Only for you to have wasted your time and limp away while the next bitch gets the $100 and everything else in his bank account.

So ladies, know what you want, accept what you want, accept what you get, and know what you get is all there'll ever be.

3 comments:

James Tubman said...

this might go against your rules but like the saying goes easy cum easy go lol

you cant give it up to early and expect the other person to stick around when you catch feelings

you should wait at least 3 to six months before having sex with somebody that you might fall for

if you get horny you can alwasy go to someone who you know for a fact you will never have a relationship with

that might be impossible

i dont know

but in order for people to respect you you have to respect yourself

and by withholding your temple you force him to respect you or get to steppin

just some random thoughts

be well my sister

Anonymous said...

I can't say that I agree with "what you get is all there will ever be". men only go as far as you allow them to go.

A guy I was talkin to recently told me that its about what you accept. If you accept a man just fucking you wit no attachments then that's cool but don't automatically expect the dude to roll into a relationship when you decided originally to only roll in the sheets.

Francesca said...

James, I love your comment! I plan on using (so not the right word) this other guy for sex while waiting for things to pop off with Deondre. But 3-6 months! LOL! If nothing ever happens, I can deal, I guess.